Everyday psychology

Everyday psychology

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Most of us will experience several crises during a lifetime. Insanity as a result of sudden shocks that life provides can manifest in different forms. In this article we examine life crises and how to handle them. How do we relate to the Shock of it all? What distinguishes those people who come out stronger from the crisis, and what about those who never really recover?

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In difficult situations we sometimes need a good advice, but all advice is not as good. In this article we investigate the "psychology of good advice". What is the hallmark of a really good advice in a psychological perspective?

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What is insanity and what is normality? Often we understand insanity as the opposite of rationality. Here we meet Sophiya. She is an accomplished consultant, but when she loses her job, she also “loses herself”. What happens? We will try to take a closer look at the border between mental illness and good mental health.

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By reading Tolle’s teachings, one realizes that it is often practical and prudent to act on our thoughts, but other times it is enough just to accept, recognize and observe the thoughts going through our minds without buying into them or act. This insight is valuable, especially for a western mind, which all too often loses his temper in traffic.

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I believe that the hyper-individualistic culture in America, which reached its zenith in the “me decade”, fostered regression to magical and narcissistic levels. I believe that the breakdown of more socially cohesive structures turned individuals back on their own resources, and this also helped reactivate narcissistic tendencies. Angels, yoga, tarot cards & crystals characterize the great packaging, but Ken Wilber believes that the appealing surface of the new age movement conceals both narcissism and magical thinking. Are there any dangers in the metaphysical funfairs?

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Vera was neglected as a child. She grew up, married and had to kids. In her marriage she behaves badly, as if she would like to be abandoned and disliked so the story of her past can repeat itself. To change her life, Vera has to forgive the past, and then she has to forgive herself before she can reinvent her life. Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, nor does it mean that you've given the message that what someone did was okay. It just means that you've let go of the anger or guilt towards someone, or towards yourself.

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Negative emotions cloud out perspective and bring in a state of self-doubt. A daunting wall of apprehension, disgust, and self-hate is formed and stands in the way of the ability to look at life with a positive mind. This is a story about the psychology of lost confidence and low self-esteem.

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Many of us view realism to be a scientific and rational choice. Yet, there are times in our lives when we will question whether realism is helping us to experience life and all it offers or limiting our experiences.

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Dreams are the source of the belief in something better. Dreams and visions might save us when we feel we have reached the bottom. Dreams and reality are not always compatible, and the challenge is how to find a good balance between reality and dreams in relation to important choices in life.

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Juliet struggles with aggression and low self-esteem, which probably relates to her difficult childhood. An overly involved mother and the use of corporal punishment has left Juliet with emotional trauma. How can she manage her anger problems?

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Good communication can be difficult to maintain in stressful daily life. The ability to talk to each other is an essential ingredient in what is called quality time. How is this in a relationship? ‘Quality of life’, ‘quality time’ and other terms related to ‘quality’ are in regular use. Pause and think about what this means.

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Memories can suddenly strike and inflict anxiety and panic in an otherwise harmless situation. Mental noise disrupts the lives of many people. Memories have the capacity to alter our feelings, change our world view and perception of the realities that surround us.

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Loneliness – that universal human feeling – can do things to the most rational among us. Loneliness that comes along with a feeling of despair can be a very difficult phase that affects us mentally and physically.

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When we go to a family that has just faced a tragic loss, we are trying to express solidarity with the survivors. It can often be difficult to meet people in grief. How should you behave and what to say? How can we offer our condolences in a good way? Here are some guidelines.

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Urban environments can drain our mental resources with constant and urgent stimuli. Paying attention to nature seems to reboot, restore and refresh our ability to pay attention and deal with stress.

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As our minds continuously focus on the externals, we might end up feeling empty. This emptiness deepens with time as relationships fail and there is emotional trauma. The mind is in a state of inertia.

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There are two types of criticism. One is nonthreatening and impartial, while the other comes from critical people that compensate for their own sense of dissatisfaction by complaining about others. How do we express and receive criticism? How can we distinguish the constructive form of criticism from the more malignant types?

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Obedience and loyalty ensures that people reach their goals together, but by blind conformity we risk losing ourselves and our values. It can be dangerous!

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Some people carry misplaced guilt that causes anxiety and depression. Others may lie to save themselves or falsely place blame on others without any feeling of guilt. How can we understand the psychology of guilt?